Haven for the Human Amoeba

I have been this way for 10 years, and I like it.....a lot. It is a kind of freedom I never thought I'd find. I already have children, so what do I need sex for anymore. I thought I loved sex for many years, but it seems to take over your life. I miss intimacy and love, even romance, but sex is just something that seems annoying and too......I don't know, it just interferes too much. I wouldn't mind it, would probably even like it occasionally, if I could find the right person who would feel like I do about sex not being necessary with love. Maybe I am saying too much for a new member.

Really happy I noticed the link in netscape-news this morning. I thought there was something wrong with me all this time or that I was unique (in this way). Its just nice to know theres other people like me out there and to know that I'm not alone.

I am a new member and came here hoping for some conversation! There is none to be found? Is this group defunct? Did you go someplace else?

-Londa NY

Hi, I´ve just found you guys and would like to know more about asexuality and ask why you use the term "amoeba" for asexuals.

I was real happy to find this group, joined it several days ago, and thought I posted a message. But it's not here. So, here is this one. Have lost all interest in sex about 10 years ago. So now I am free, and happy to be free of those drives, but I notice that nothing else is as bright as it used to be. I'm not unhappy about it, quite relieved actually. I am very available to my family, my grandchildren, can come and go as I please, do anything I want to, when I want to. I know I could probably take hormones to revert back to a woman searching for someone, but I really don't want to. Too much hassle. I used to pray for this day, and now it's here, and I love it. The only thing I get lonely for occasionally, is to belong to someone who loves me and is always in my corner. But then, I might have to cook and do his laundry and be home "on time", might have to ask his opinion on buying something, blah, blah. I not only don't have the urge to look, I actually "cross the street" to avoid any circumstance that might tempt me.....as I remember what that feels like. Delicious, but very time consuming and annoying. I must have joined something else last week too by following links and groups. But I like the name of this one for some reason. So, hello everyone.

Hello !

Dating is probably not the main goal of this mailing list, but I take this opportunity to meet people among the asexual community !

So lets introduce myself. My name is Clément, I'm a 30 years old asexual French man living in Germany. I'm working as a scientist. My hobbies are photography, reading books, listening music (Jazz, …), going out with friends, hill walking, etc

I enjoy my life, but I miss a woman on my side. I am attracted by women, but I have no interest in sex. Sexual intercourse is something that repulse me. It does not bother me at all, and I feel happy about being asexual. But I don't like to live alone, and I am looking for a woman to share my life. I am looking for love, for a long-term relationship were sex is not involved. My perfect soulmate should be a cuddly woman, without any interest in sex. Her physical appearance is not my main concern, but intellectual affinity is essential.

Feel free to contact me ! Lets make acquaintance ! And if your are looking for friendship only, that's also perfectly fine for me !

Clément

I never realized there were any studies or other people that were asexual. I'm ecstatic!

hi there everyone. i am very new to this and am not actually a-sexual myself. however my big sister joanna is. all she wants is to find a loving companion. she is a very affectionate sweet talented girl but due to not being at all interested in sex has never been able to hold down a relationship. does anyone know where she could meet like minded friends? she doesn't have access to the internet. i would really appreciate it if someone would point me in the right direction. thanks so much jess x x x

I never really cared about sex and the topic never really bothered me, but once I moved to college I was really alone and I very much wanted to be with someone just for the closeness. I never dated before and don't know the first thing about starting a relationship, so I've been paralyzed with the thought that sex was just expected. I'm really glad that I'll have a means of explaining that I'm asexual and not seem like a complete wierdo isolated from the world. I've been beaming all day, thank God there are asexual groups in the world, my heart is at rest!

This is my starting email for the group.

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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Hi, I am a new member and would like to ask why the comparison with the amoeba. It sounds a little strange to me.

I just joined this club and need help becoming celibate. Im still sexual in a way but my true desire is to be completely celibate, Without thoughts of sexuality either. Any ways I am Cesar and what drives me to become asexual is my buddhist biliefs.

I just joined this club and need help becoming celibate. Im still sexual in a way but my true desire is to be completely celibate, Without thoughts of sexuality either. Any ways I am Cesar and what drives me to become asexual is my buddhist biliefs.

As someone who used to be a practicing Buddhist, I do not see the connection between Buddhism and asexuality. :)

glenn

Hi Cesar,

I don't think you will find the information you are looking for through this group. There is a difference between people who have sexual desire and choose not to act on it and those(in this group) who have no sexual desire to speak of making it a natural cause and affect to not have sex. I am actually on another list which is really active called the celibacysupportgroup. You can look it up in yahoo group list. But this group is not a relgiously motivated group whatsoever. These are a group of people have chosen celibacy for other personal reasons but you may find it more helpful.

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There is 1 message in this issue.

Topics in this digest:

1. Re: Hi From: "kilraven62" <kilraven@...>

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Message

1

Date

Sat, 30 Oct 2004 14:49:07 -0000

From

"kilraven62" <kilraven@...>

Subject

Re: Hi

Cesar Savinon said:

I just joined this club and need help becoming celibate. Im still sexual in a way but my true desire is to be completely celibate, Without thoughts of sexuality either. Any ways I am Cesar and what drives me to become asexual is my buddhist biliefs.

As someone who used to be a practicing Buddhist, I do not see the connection between Buddhism and asexuality. :)

glenn

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Yahoo! Groups Links

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/havenforthehumanamoeba/

[email protected]

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Hi Charlotte. Sounds like you found the right place. I am a guy who also has no interest in a sexual relationship. There are lots of us out there.

I was real happy to find this group, joined it several days ago, and thought I posted a message. But it's not here. So, here is this one. Have lost all interest in sex about 10 years ago. So now I am free, and happy to be free of those drives, but I notice that nothing else is as bright as it used to be. I'm not unhappy about it, quite relieved actually. I am very available to my family, my grandchildren, can come and go as I please, do anything I want to, when I want to. I know I could probably take hormones to revert back to a woman searching for someone, but I really don't want to. Too much hassle. I used to pray for this day, and now it's here, and I love it. The only thing I get lonely for occasionally, is to belong to someone who loves me and is always in my corner. But then, I might have to cook and do his laundry and be home "on time", might have to ask his opinion on buying something, blah, blah. I not only don't have the urge to look, I actually "cross the street" to avoid any circumstance that might tempt me.....as I remember what that feels like. Delicious, but very time consuming and annoying. I must have joined something else last week too by following links and groups. But I like the name of this one for some reason. So, hello everyone.

Hello! Just found this group.

I only recently discovered the term asexuality (thanks to New Scientist & Triple J's Hack!) and realised how much I relate to it. Oh, I'm from Australia and am 20 :)

I've had 4 boyfriends before but they all end up as friends, no sexual attraction at all and its not just low sex drive or whatever, just nothing. I find people attractive and beautiful but more of the admiration than anything. I still keep in contact with all my former partners as good friends so no amosity.

I am definitely a passionate person, though, especially with music, films and arts.

My category is that I have sexual feelings, but as a man I have no desire to have intercourse with a woman. I have no desire to screw anyone in the butt either! Where does my type hang out?

Hi Cesar,

I don't think you will find the information you are looking for through this group. There is a difference between people who have sexual desire and choose not to act on it and those(in this group) who have no sexual desire to speak of making it a natural cause and affect to not have sex. I am actually on another list which is really active called the celibacysupportgroup. You can look it up in yahoo group list. But this group is not a relgiously motivated group whatsoever. These are a group of people have chosen celibacy for other personal reasons but you may find it more helpful.

[email protected] said:

------------------------ Yahoo! Groups Sponsor --------------------~--> Make a clean sweep of pop-up ads. Yahoo! Companion Toolbar. Now with Pop-Up Blocker. Get it for free!

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There is 1 message in this issue.

Topics in this digest:

1. Re: Hi From: "kilraven62" <kilraven@t...>

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---

Message

1

Date

Sat, 30 Oct 2004 14:49:07 -0000

From

"kilraven62" <kilraven@t...>

Subject

Re: Hi

Cesar Savinon said:

I just joined this club and need help becoming celibate. Im still sexual in a way but my true desire is to be completely celibate, Without thoughts of sexuality either. Any ways I am Cesar and what drives me to become asexual is my buddhist biliefs.

As someone who used to be a practicing Buddhist, I do not see the connection between Buddhism and asexuality. :)

glenn

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Yahoo! Groups Links

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/havenforthehumanamoeba/

[email protected]

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Do you Yahoo!? Express yourself with Y! Messenger! Free. Download now. http://messenger.yahoo.com

My post got lost also. Plus no one has posted in a couple of weeks here. Something up? Good for you Charlotte, to live free of sex. I have no desires either. I could take hormones, viagra, or whatever, but that would just be stupid as far as I am concerned. My main loss of desire is due to the failure to feel the earth move during the act.

I actually "cross the street" to avoid any circumstance that might tempt me.....as I remember what that feels like. Delicious, but very time consuming and annoying.

Funny !!!! How true!

This is my first post here. I just wanted to say that I'm just starting to think that I maybe asexual. I have gone to the asexual.org web site and I have learned a lot from them. But I'm still looking for more information on and about asexuality. I still have some sexual feelings and fantasies. But now I feel I don't have any sexual feeling towards men or women when I see them in person. I also get nervous and uncomfortable when people touch me. I'm also very very shy around people I really don't know.

:)

Heeeeey! Everyone I am in another yahoo group, a celibate group for a few years now. Well they just sent an email to my account of a member disturbed which seemed like of this site....I couldn't make heads or tales of it. So I copied and paste and hear I am. I was glad to see what I saw upon the site homepage so I joined. I have a adequate yahoo profile and I am asexual.

Thanks! Shahida(Shyi) http://members.blackplanet.com/Shahida http://members.blackplanet.com/0Shyi

hello to everyone. I wonder how, after years of being a and knowing that I am a, I did not discover this website. I am happy to find that we have a large and diverse gathering here as well! First, a little about myself: I am 23/f and am a phd student in NC/USA; I fear to disclose the name of the university-just in case! As you can imagine, I also have faced issues about coming out-although Ihave experimented with telling people outright that I am a in the past, things have not turned out so well. Usually people concluded that I just had not found the "right one" or that I lacked attraction potential. grrr. Anyhow, I'd always known that something was a bit off about me (besides my taste in music, my love of the black and gloomy, not to mention vampires:)); around the age of 18, I concluded that I did indeed lack attraction potential. I later developed this notion into positing that I can neither attract nor be attracted. Then, at the age of 20, I chanced upon the word "asexual" in the most unlikely place possible: in Anne Rice's Vampire Chronicles. I had gotten the concept right in my head but had been searching for the correct term, so to speak.

I've identified myself as an asexual since the age of 20. I've been a member of another asexuality site for about 2 years; on that site further distinctions are made: ie whether you are hetero oriented a or gay oriented a. In terms of that, I am the former-for better or worse:) A further distinction is in terms of types-whether one is able to be attracted in an asexual but aesthetic/intellectual sort of way. Unfortunately, I would say that I am able to be attracted in that fashion-a situation which results in continual heartache and disappointment. No one can contest that it is painful to see friends and colleagues involved with their significant others while you know in your heart that you are helpless in solitude.

Not to get too dramatic on you folks but the gist of the matter is this: I lament the fact that society places primary emphasis on relationships with significant others. Often, friends ditch me in favor of their bfs or gfs; that is the most frustrating experience ever. My biggest hope is to form one or several meaningful committed friendships without the constraints of conventional romantic relationship attached to them.

anyhow, that's been a long post-I fear to bore you all. In addition, as I've specified in my profile, I am also probably the one and only representative from my country (so I am glad to add to the diversity of our group but I fear to be overly presumptious in assuming that I am the only one!). Speaking of, I would love to meet anyone else from home-Turkey. is there anyone out there?? though, I sincerely doubt it. Unfortunately, folks back home-including friends and family-were not in the least convinced that I am a; I could not even make much headway in assuring them that such a category exists in the first place!! I did have a couple of friends whom I predicted would turn out to be a but alas, they turned out to be very much non-a!!lol Anyhow, as a last word, in terms of coming out, I've usually encountered derisive comments with an underlying sentiment of pity-all hinting at my physical deficiencies. Sorry, folks, but I don't see myself that way. All in all, I am glad that this yahoo site exists and I am looking forward to sharing experiences with you guys and meeting likeminded ppl online and (hopefully) in real life in the years to come.

best, betterunborn

Hello to all the existing members here and welcome to the new members.

Although I am sure asexuality has been around for eons, it is only just now being hailed and recognized (in the media) as a legitimate sexual orientation.

As the new co-moderator of this group, I will be able to assist in getting messages approved quicker so that conversation threads can arise and members can begin to learn and share about their asexual experiences.

I will periodically post news and other articles pertaining to asexuality in order to stimulate conversation and keep members here aware of what is being posted for the general population to read about "us" the asexuals.

Over the next few weeks I will be doing some adjustments with the files and folders in order to make the group more friendly and welcoming to new members.

Once again, I would like to welcome all the newcomers to this group and to encourage all to post introductory messages so that we can begin to build a working support community here.

Staci

Do you Yahoo!? Discover all that’s new in My Yahoo!

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Welcome to the group and thanks for the introductory message.

There are certainly romantic asexuals here, so you don't have to feel like you are alone. I myself am a romantic asexual and while I enjoy kissing, cuddling and some caressing, that is the extent of my sexual desire.

Staci

Hello! Just found this group.

I only recently discovered the term asexuality (thanks to New Scientist & Triple J's Hack!) and realised how much I relate to it. Oh, I'm from Australia and am 20 :)

I've had 4 boyfriends before but they all end up as friends, no sexual attraction at all and its not just low sex drive or whatever, just nothing. I find people attractive and beautiful but more of the admiration than anything. I still keep in contact with all my former partners as good friends so no amosity.

I am definitely a passionate person, though, especially with music, films and arts.

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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

I believe that would make you a romantic asexual. I wish I knew where you type would hang out, because that is where I would be also.

Thanks for sharing this information with us.

Staci

My category is that I have sexual feelings, but as a man I have no desire to have intercourse with a woman. I have no desire to screw anyone in the butt either! Where does my type hang out?

Hi Cesar,

I don't think you will find the information you are looking for through this group. There is a difference between people who have sexual desire and choose not to act on it and those(in this group) who have no sexual desire to speak of making it a natural cause and affect to not have sex. I am actually on another list which is really active called the celibacysupportgroup. You can look it up in yahoo group list. But this group is not a relgiously motivated group whatsoever. These are a group of people have chosen celibacy for other personal reasons but you may find it more helpful.

[email protected] said:

Do you Yahoo!? Discover all that’s new in My Yahoo!

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Sorry for the delay in approving the messages.

Since I spend lots of time on the internet and moderate several groups here on yahoo, I will be able to approve messages for this group much quicker in the future.

Thanks for the patience you have all displayed in the delays for approved messages, this issue has been addressed and everyone should see a big difference, with MUCH shorter approval times.

Staci

My post got lost also. Plus no one has posted in a couple of weeks here. Something up? Good for you Charlotte, to live free of sex. I have no desires either. I could take hormones, viagra, or whatever, but that would just be stupid as far as I am concerned. My main loss of desire is due to the failure to feel the earth move during the act.

I actually "cross the street" to avoid any circumstance that might tempt me.....as I remember what that feels like. Delicious, but very time consuming and annoying.

Funny !!!! How true!

Do you Yahoo!? Discover all that’s new in My Yahoo!

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]