Haven for the Human Amoeba

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absofsteel19 21/M/K_town
absofsteel19
21/M/K_town
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Re: to Eiji.

Parent Comment

Eiji, What I'm seeing in all youre post is a lot of personal issues with how the world is. Now that is understandable, because the world is fucked up. But that's because people are fucked up, and guess what, so are you. So am I. everyone is. You seem to mistake your personal hangups for a superior way of looking at things. I'm sounding selfrighteous by accident, but I don't think you would have any right to call me on it right now. To be honest you're pissing me and others off, because you are introducing topics of conversation into the forums that don't belong here. I don't see how you are an Asexual, or supportive of them. I know you envy them, becaus eyou think that they are in some way superior. They aren't Superior to sexuals. They just have a different way of existing. I think you have these high Ideals for mankind and are upset subconciously by the realization that you don't meet your own criteria. I invite you to examine your criteria for judging humanity, but I doubt you'll take me up on that. But this is not the forum for these things. Find a Eugenics forum and a Utopia forum for your other opinions.

Kindly stick to the topics of Asexuality from now on. Thanks.

Word!!

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eiji001 26/M/Dayton, Ohio
eiji001
26/M/Dayton, Ohio
Permalink

Re: Outlawing Sex

Parent Comment

Workers are just cogs in the machine of industry... they aren't desgined to have emotions, drives (other than survival), or other such frivolous wants....<<

Umm...this is your utopia? I thought that this was the reason we should embrace technology, because workers are not without emotions and desires, as well they shouldn't be. Would you want to be treated by an emotionless doctor, or taught by a passionless instructor? I don't understand how the world which you describe is supposed to be an improvement over the extant one, and I'm fairly certain that you have no desire to make yourself clearly understood.

Incidentally, I think pot and heroin and all other personal vices should be completely legalized. If you want to think of it in labor terms, we expend far too many resources attempting to curtail behavior that really cannot be controlled on a wide-scale basis.

Judy

my "superior society" would work on ONE premise.. emotions just get in the way of what NEEDS to be done.

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eiji001 26/M/Dayton, Ohio
eiji001
26/M/Dayton, Ohio
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Re: for definition purposes.

Parent Comment

I consider myself repressed.... Have to be if I don't want to be considered the "potential rapist" that I keep hearing my sister call "ALL men". (and I'm POSTIVE she's not alone in thinking that... but I say that if they HAVE to think that, leave the FOURTH AMENDMENT in the equation!!!!!!!)<<

Look, blaming your sexual repression on flighty women is convenient as hell, but very disingenuous at the core. There are a lot of women who are incredibly sexually aggressive and they make themselves very well known. Why not go take up with one of them. The problem is that men get rebuffed by women who never solicited their attention and then they assume that all women are adverse toward sexual advances, which is not at all the case.

Judy

you don't understand.... I'm viewed as a sexual predator when sex is the LAST thing on my mind.

I have two rules that I'd choose death before breaking them....

1. I don't think of sex unless the girls SAYS I can.

2. Any sex AT ALL that enters a relationship with me will be up to the woman to decide (making the decision to become sexual is not mine to make... it's not my place)

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judysins
judysins
Permalink

Re: The loss of Captial punishment

Parent Comment

Rape is about Power and Domination, but if you castrate the individaul they'll find other ways of establishing their power, like Venture capitalism or other forms of violent crime.

Rape is about Power and Domination, but if you castrate the individaul they'll find other ways of establishing their power, like Venture capitalism or other forms of violent crime<<

That's precisely my point. Castration does nothing to relieve an individual of his violent temperment. If anything it is likely to make that individual more violent because his usual means of attack has been frustrated. The use of a penis isn't the only way to sexually violate someone.

Judy

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eiji001 26/M/Dayton, Ohio
eiji001
26/M/Dayton, Ohio
Permalink

Re: to Eiji.

Parent Comment

Eiji, What I'm seeing in all youre post is a lot of personal issues with how the world is. Now that is understandable, because the world is fucked up. But that's because people are fucked up, and guess what, so are you. So am I. everyone is. You seem to mistake your personal hangups for a superior way of looking at things. I'm sounding selfrighteous by accident, but I don't think you would have any right to call me on it right now. To be honest you're pissing me and others off, because you are introducing topics of conversation into the forums that don't belong here. I don't see how you are an Asexual, or supportive of them. I know you envy them, becaus eyou think that they are in some way superior. They aren't Superior to sexuals. They just have a different way of existing. I think you have these high Ideals for mankind and are upset subconciously by the realization that you don't meet your own criteria. I invite you to examine your criteria for judging humanity, but I doubt you'll take me up on that. But this is not the forum for these things. Find a Eugenics forum and a Utopia forum for your other opinions.

Kindly stick to the topics of Asexuality from now on. Thanks.

I apologize if I offended anyone...

(Frustration can do some very "sub-human" things to people, I'm afraid)

I joined because I thought I might have been asexual because my sexuality just gets in my way (which is never good).. I thought I could learn to mimic you people, and get this demon called sexuality out of my mind once and for all.

If you want me to shut up that's fine, and if you want me to leave and never return just give the word.

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judysins
judysins
Permalink

Re: Outlawing Sex

Parent Comment

my "superior society" would work on ONE premise.. emotions just get in the way of what NEEDS to be done.

my "superior society" would work on ONE premise.. emotions just get in the way of what NEEDS to be done.<<

Emotions are the reason why we do most of the things that we do... Wait a minute, why am I trying to dignify an irrational statement with a rational response. Damn it! I've got to stop doing that!

Judy

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eiji001 26/M/Dayton, Ohio
eiji001
26/M/Dayton, Ohio
Permalink

Re: Outlawing Sex

Parent Comment

my "superior society" would work on ONE premise.. emotions just get in the way of what NEEDS to be done.<<

Emotions are the reason why we do most of the things that we do... Wait a minute, why am I trying to dignify an irrational statement with a rational response. Damn it! I've got to stop doing that!

Judy

I can relate to your confusion... emotions do that to me too.

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eiji001 26/M/Dayton, Ohio
eiji001
26/M/Dayton, Ohio
Permalink

Re: Outlawing Sex

Parent Comment

my "superior society" would work on ONE premise.. emotions just get in the way of what NEEDS to be done.<<

Emotions are the reason why we do most of the things that we do... Wait a minute, why am I trying to dignify an irrational statement with a rational response. Damn it! I've got to stop doing that!

Judy

Judy.. I have a few questions I'd like to ask you privately....

could you email me at Eiji001@...? (No politicking this time)

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judysins
judysins
Permalink

Re: to Eiji.

Parent Comment

I apologize if I offended anyone...

(Frustration can do some very "sub-human" things to people, I'm afraid)

I joined because I thought I might have been asexual because my sexuality just gets in my way (which is never good).. I thought I could learn to mimic you people, and get this demon called sexuality out of my mind once and for all.

If you want me to shut up that's fine, and if you want me to leave and never return just give the word.

I apologize if I offended anyone...<<

Oh no, please don't become apologetic. It takes all of the fun out of critiquing your misguided ideals.

Judy

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judysins
judysins
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Re: Outlawing Sex

Parent Comment

Judy.. I have a few questions I'd like to ask you privately....

could you email me at Eiji001@...? (No politicking this time)

Judy.. I have a few questions I'd like to ask you privately....

could you email me at Eiji001@...? (No politicking this time)<<

Hmm...the last time someone from one of the clubs tried to have an e-mail correspondence with me the results were less than satisfactory, to say the least. But I'm a resilient chick. So you if you've got questions direct them to judysins@...

Judy

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tngirltech 21/F/Proudly from the USA
tngirltech
21/F/Proudly from the USA
Permalink

Re: Outlawing Sex

Parent Comment

Judy.. I have a few questions I'd like to ask you privately....

could you email me at Eiji001@...? (No politicking this time)

Eiji:

From the conversations we have had and your post, you are most likely not asexual. You are more antisexual if that(not to mention that on your profile all of your interests include adult encounters/pic trading). I am not picking on you for this and your post I am sure that you are still welcome as long as (like Pimp says) you stick to the topics of the forum.

--GT

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eiji001 26/M/Dayton, Ohio
eiji001
26/M/Dayton, Ohio
Permalink

Re: Outlawing Sex

Parent Comment

Eiji:

From the conversations we have had and your post, you are most likely not asexual. You are more antisexual if that(not to mention that on your profile all of your interests include adult encounters/pic trading). I am not picking on you for this and your post I am sure that you are still welcome as long as (like Pimp says) you stick to the topics of the forum.

--GT

I've long since quit the club that was related to... does anyone know how to remove it???? (I haven't been able to for some reason)

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therealplatonicpimp
therealplatonicpimp
Permalink

Re: to Eiji.

Parent Comment

I apologize if I offended anyone...

(Frustration can do some very "sub-human" things to people, I'm afraid)

I joined because I thought I might have been asexual because my sexuality just gets in my way (which is never good).. I thought I could learn to mimic you people, and get this demon called sexuality out of my mind once and for all.

If you want me to shut up that's fine, and if you want me to leave and never return just give the word.

We don't want you to Leave, but just stick to the topics.

As for emulating Asexuals, I know that in many ways it's a good thing. I do it a lot. But I am sexual, and so are you, it appears, and there is no way to change that. I would consider it unhealthy to deny one's sexuality, given that it is there. So one would probably be better off if one learnt to accept their Hormones and urges. What may fit better for you is what I term Platonic. The Idea is that, though one has sexuality, they don't form relationships or make decisions based Primarily on their sexual urges. Does that sound like it would work for you? I hope I don't sound like I'm attempting to recruit you. I am, but I want to be subtle about it.

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eiji001 28/M/Dayton, Ohio
eiji001
28/M/Dayton, Ohio
Permalink

Re: to Eiji.

Parent Comment

We don't want you to Leave, but just stick to the topics.

As for emulating Asexuals, I know that in many ways it's a good thing. I do it a lot. But I am sexual, and so are you, it appears, and there is no way to change that. I would consider it unhealthy to deny one's sexuality, given that it is there. So one would probably be better off if one learnt to accept their Hormones and urges. What may fit better for you is what I term Platonic. The Idea is that, though one has sexuality, they don't form relationships or make decisions based Primarily on their sexual urges. Does that sound like it would work for you? I hope I don't sound like I'm attempting to recruit you. I am, but I want to be subtle about it.

If you want to know why I ranted the way I did... email me at Eiji001@... and I'll tell you.

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absofsteel19 21/M/K_town
absofsteel19
21/M/K_town
Permalink

remove

Parent Comment

If you want to know why I ranted the way I did... email me at Eiji001@... and I'll tell you.

To remove yourself from those clubs go to the clubs top homepage @ yahoo, then next to My Clubs there is an edit button, click on that.

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drksparkle 23/F
drksparkle
23/F
Permalink

Re: The loss of Captial punishment

Parent Comment

Castration of serial rapists would solve a lot of problems.<<

Sigh, I know that the following statement is practically a cliche but: RAPE IS NOT SIMPLY ABOUT SEX. It's about domination and ego-boosting. I cringe to think what more horrible ways rapists will come up with to violate their victims when they've been relieved of their erections.

Judy

Rape rarely has anything to do with sex. I am well aware of this. My opinion is, however, that castration would lead to less aggressive urges and therefore less aggressive behaviors.

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drksparkle 23/F
drksparkle
23/F
Permalink

Eiji psychoanalysis, I deeply apologize

Parent Comment

If you want to know why I ranted the way I did... email me at Eiji001@... and I'll tell you.

I think you explained your reasons for ranting the way you did. For the most part, anyway. My problem with your modes of coversation, Eiji, is that you are entirely subjective about your situations. Most of the time, when I've had conversations with you, you say that you're a "potential rapist" in the eyes of all women, and that you "know" this by "looks" you get. You refuse to accept the fact that there may be something in your tone or body language, or even in your perception of what really is a normal look.

You're obsessed with the idea that women hate you. You're comfortable in your little niche of women-hatred, as many people are comfortable in their little worlds of emotional complexities. I know from my own experience and from the experiences of others that we often embrace our shortcomings. It's almost human nature, but ultimately self-destructive. It's like someone with an eating disorder joining a support group to get tips on how to perpetuate the disorder. It happens.

One of my pet peeves is when people complain about things that could easily be changed. Yes, there are some bad women out there. Yes there are women who will use and abuse you and take everything they can get. Yes, sex can cause disease, but we must keep things in perspective.

You think asexuals are superior and you want to be one, but it seems to me that you'd rather be a sexual person who doesn't feel like women hate him. Change the attitudes all the women in the world and you'd be a happy little camper. Or (even simpler) change your own attitude instead. I don't even think you're antisexual. It seems like you've scewed your bad-woman philosophy into a bad-sex philosophy and then ridden off into the sunset with it.

I'm sorry for this analysis, I hate it when people try to do things like this to me, so I can only imagine how you feel about it, Eiji. I just felt I had to say it.

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drksparkle 23/F
drksparkle
23/F
Permalink

Re: Eiji psychoanalysis, I deeply apolog

Parent Comment

I think you explained your reasons for ranting the way you did. For the most part, anyway. My problem with your modes of coversation, Eiji, is that you are entirely subjective about your situations. Most of the time, when I've had conversations with you, you say that you're a "potential rapist" in the eyes of all women, and that you "know" this by "looks" you get. You refuse to accept the fact that there may be something in your tone or body language, or even in your perception of what really is a normal look.

You're obsessed with the idea that women hate you. You're comfortable in your little niche of women-hatred, as many people are comfortable in their little worlds of emotional complexities. I know from my own experience and from the experiences of others that we often embrace our shortcomings. It's almost human nature, but ultimately self-destructive. It's like someone with an eating disorder joining a support group to get tips on how to perpetuate the disorder. It happens.

One of my pet peeves is when people complain about things that could easily be changed. Yes, there are some bad women out there. Yes there are women who will use and abuse you and take everything they can get. Yes, sex can cause disease, but we must keep things in perspective.

You think asexuals are superior and you want to be one, but it seems to me that you'd rather be a sexual person who doesn't feel like women hate him. Change the attitudes all the women in the world and you'd be a happy little camper. Or (even simpler) change your own attitude instead. I don't even think you're antisexual. It seems like you've scewed your bad-woman philosophy into a bad-sex philosophy and then ridden off into the sunset with it.

I'm sorry for this analysis, I hate it when people try to do things like this to me, so I can only imagine how you feel about it, Eiji. I just felt I had to say it.

I realize it may have been tactless of me to post an opinion of one person in a public forum. I don't believe in apologies (despite the title of my previous post), but I do believe in admitting to personality flaws. I did get carried away.

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bloodyredcommie
bloodyredcommie
Permalink

Of immediate concern

I hate to use this forum for political purposes, but..

On Tuesday, October 9, at 12:15 p.m. in 107 Shanklin, a panel consisting of

faculty members from the Philosophy Department will discuss "Ethical Issues

in the Current Crisis."

On Wednesday, October 10, at 12:15 p.m. in PAC001, Douglas Foyle,

Department of Government will discuss, "Public Opinion, American Foreign

Policy and the War on Terrorism."

Wesleyan University students, faculty, and staff, as well as members of the

public, are welcome to attend both events, to ask questions, and to

participate in discussion.

Joy Vodak

This seems like an extremely relevant topic to me, don't know if I'm alone on this. Peruse and (if people feel like it) discuss how asexuality's related to this issue?

-BRC

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bloodyredcommie
bloodyredcommie
Permalink

Re: Of immediate concern

Parent Comment

I hate to use this forum for political purposes, but..

On Tuesday, October 9, at 12:15 p.m. in 107 Shanklin, a panel consisting of

faculty members from the Philosophy Department will discuss "Ethical Issues

in the Current Crisis."

On Wednesday, October 10, at 12:15 p.m. in PAC001, Douglas Foyle,

Department of Government will discuss, "Public Opinion, American Foreign

Policy and the War on Terrorism."

Wesleyan University students, faculty, and staff, as well as members of the

public, are welcome to attend both events, to ask questions, and to

participate in discussion.

Joy Vodak

This seems like an extremely relevant topic to me, don't know if I'm alone on this. Peruse and (if people feel like it) discuss how asexuality's related to this issue?

-BRC

Ack!! copied this wrong E-mail. Stupid keyboard..

Here goes..

>------------------------------

>

>It ends up that while our focus is diverted to concerns about terrorism,

>some folks in Washington are using their time to quietly propose a

>Constitutional Amendment to ultimately ban gay marriages/civil unions and

>possibly domestic partnership benefits. It is being pushed through

>Congress quickly so as to make as little noise as possible.

>

>If you agree that gays and lesbians are not second class citizens and

>should be allowed the same rights as all men and women, including

>marriage/civil unions, then please go to this site and sign the petition

>in order to make your opinion known:

>

><a href=http://petitiononline.com/0712t001/petition.html target=new>http://petitiononline.com/0712t001/petition.html</a>

>

>Thanks for considering this and sending it on as you choose. We are

>appalled that this is what some folks find to busy themselves with at a

>time like this!

>

>The national constitutional ban on same-sex marriage is sponsored by the

>(very inaptly named) "Alliance for Marriage." For more information about

>AFM's efforts to get this amendment off the ground, please visit their

>website at:

>

><a href=http://www.allianceformarriage.org/index.cfm target=new>http://www.allianceformarriage.org/index.cfm</a>

>

This seems like an extremely relevant topic to me, don't know if I'm alone on this. Peruse and (if people feel like it) discuss how asexuality's related to this issue?

-BRC

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eiji001 28/M/Dayton, Ohio
eiji001
28/M/Dayton, Ohio
Permalink

Re: Of immediate concern

Parent Comment

Ack!! copied this wrong E-mail. Stupid keyboard..

Here goes..

>------------------------------

>

>It ends up that while our focus is diverted to concerns about terrorism,

>some folks in Washington are using their time to quietly propose a

>Constitutional Amendment to ultimately ban gay marriages/civil unions and

>possibly domestic partnership benefits. It is being pushed through

>Congress quickly so as to make as little noise as possible.

>

>If you agree that gays and lesbians are not second class citizens and

>should be allowed the same rights as all men and women, including

>marriage/civil unions, then please go to this site and sign the petition

>in order to make your opinion known:

>

><a href=http://petitiononline.com/0712t001/petition.html target=new>http://petitiononline.com/0712t001/petition.html</a>

>

>Thanks for considering this and sending it on as you choose. We are

>appalled that this is what some folks find to busy themselves with at a

>time like this!

>

>The national constitutional ban on same-sex marriage is sponsored by the

>(very inaptly named) "Alliance for Marriage." For more information about

>AFM's efforts to get this amendment off the ground, please visit their

>website at:

>

><a href=http://www.allianceformarriage.org/index.cfm target=new>http://www.allianceformarriage.org/index.cfm</a>

>

This seems like an extremely relevant topic to me, don't know if I'm alone on this. Peruse and (if people feel like it) discuss how asexuality's related to this issue?

-BRC

Damn right it is..... if the GLBs go first, who knows how long before you get targeted yourselves...

I for one have been mistaken for gay before (when I was 15, and the scars are still healing).

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drksparkle 23/F
drksparkle
23/F
Permalink

Marriage, sorry I got carried away.

Parent Comment

Ack!! copied this wrong E-mail. Stupid keyboard..

Here goes..

>------------------------------

>

>It ends up that while our focus is diverted to concerns about terrorism,

>some folks in Washington are using their time to quietly propose a

>Constitutional Amendment to ultimately ban gay marriages/civil unions and

>possibly domestic partnership benefits. It is being pushed through

>Congress quickly so as to make as little noise as possible.

>

>If you agree that gays and lesbians are not second class citizens and

>should be allowed the same rights as all men and women, including

>marriage/civil unions, then please go to this site and sign the petition

>in order to make your opinion known:

>

><a href=http://petitiononline.com/0712t001/petition.html target=new>http://petitiononline.com/0712t001/petition.html</a>

>

>Thanks for considering this and sending it on as you choose. We are

>appalled that this is what some folks find to busy themselves with at a

>time like this!

>

>The national constitutional ban on same-sex marriage is sponsored by the

>(very inaptly named) "Alliance for Marriage." For more information about

>AFM's efforts to get this amendment off the ground, please visit their

>website at:

>

><a href=http://www.allianceformarriage.org/index.cfm target=new>http://www.allianceformarriage.org/index.cfm</a>

>

This seems like an extremely relevant topic to me, don't know if I'm alone on this. Peruse and (if people feel like it) discuss how asexuality's related to this issue?

-BRC

Ok, I don't even understand why gay people want to get married, but I see nothing wrong with them marrying any more than straight people marrying.

I have made many, many anti-marriage statements in my life. I decided to give it another thought after reading BRC's post, though. It's really not marriage that I'm against. It's the sexual essence of a marriage, the wedding night, the wedding itself, physical attraction, "soul mates" (gag), the idea of living as a unit and no longer as a person, of being a responsible adult, of managing a "household", of the expectancy of children (lots of children) and a house and a picket fence, the idea of never seeing your old friends because you're not sleeping with/having children with/managing a "household" with them, the idea of giving up FREEDOM, your own bed, late nights out. Staying together "for the children's sake" and all that other nonsense. Marriage is a flaw and a drug.

At the same time, however, I've been doing a lot of thinking about my future. I'm a terrible housekeeper, a slob, organized only in my disorganization. Let's face it, I need help. I've always planned on having some sort of house-helper move in and live with me to take care of stuff. Basically I want a wife, time-warped from the early 20th century. I completely picture this person to be male. A man-wife. The problem is, though, what to I do when future houseboy wants to get up and marry someone? I can't very well have houseboy and family in my future estate.

In a way, I do plan to marry, but not in the normal sense of the word. I will have tons of houseboys (I'll keep them until they annoy me or get married, whichever comes first)and maybe asexual partners, but I will never have a serious wedding, if a wedding at all (once I was being a smart-ass and told someone I was going to get married in a Hello Kitty costume. I might actually do that, should the occasion arise). I just can't imagine me finding a nonsexual person who just wants to manage my household, heheheheh.

I saw a statistic today, though I question its veracity. It said that for every decade after age 25 that you remain single, you should deduct 1 year from your life. If you're married, you should add 5 years to your life. Any thoughts?

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eiji001 28/M/Dayton, Ohio
eiji001
28/M/Dayton, Ohio
Permalink

Re: Marriage, sorry I got carried away.

Parent Comment

Ok, I don't even understand why gay people want to get married, but I see nothing wrong with them marrying any more than straight people marrying.

I have made many, many anti-marriage statements in my life. I decided to give it another thought after reading BRC's post, though. It's really not marriage that I'm against. It's the sexual essence of a marriage, the wedding night, the wedding itself, physical attraction, "soul mates" (gag), the idea of living as a unit and no longer as a person, of being a responsible adult, of managing a "household", of the expectancy of children (lots of children) and a house and a picket fence, the idea of never seeing your old friends because you're not sleeping with/having children with/managing a "household" with them, the idea of giving up FREEDOM, your own bed, late nights out. Staying together "for the children's sake" and all that other nonsense. Marriage is a flaw and a drug.

At the same time, however, I've been doing a lot of thinking about my future. I'm a terrible housekeeper, a slob, organized only in my disorganization. Let's face it, I need help. I've always planned on having some sort of house-helper move in and live with me to take care of stuff. Basically I want a wife, time-warped from the early 20th century. I completely picture this person to be male. A man-wife. The problem is, though, what to I do when future houseboy wants to get up and marry someone? I can't very well have houseboy and family in my future estate.

In a way, I do plan to marry, but not in the normal sense of the word. I will have tons of houseboys (I'll keep them until they annoy me or get married, whichever comes first)and maybe asexual partners, but I will never have a serious wedding, if a wedding at all (once I was being a smart-ass and told someone I was going to get married in a Hello Kitty costume. I might actually do that, should the occasion arise). I just can't imagine me finding a nonsexual person who just wants to manage my household, heheheheh.

I saw a statistic today, though I question its veracity. It said that for every decade after age 25 that you remain single, you should deduct 1 year from your life. If you're married, you should add 5 years to your life. Any thoughts?

I've seen studies similar to that... they also mention that people with S.O.s also have lower instantces of heart problems, certian kinds of cancer, and several other maladies (one I liked was requiring less sleep and food).

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judysins
judysins
Permalink

Re: Marriage, sorry I got carried away.

Parent Comment

Ok, I don't even understand why gay people want to get married, but I see nothing wrong with them marrying any more than straight people marrying.

I have made many, many anti-marriage statements in my life. I decided to give it another thought after reading BRC's post, though. It's really not marriage that I'm against. It's the sexual essence of a marriage, the wedding night, the wedding itself, physical attraction, "soul mates" (gag), the idea of living as a unit and no longer as a person, of being a responsible adult, of managing a "household", of the expectancy of children (lots of children) and a house and a picket fence, the idea of never seeing your old friends because you're not sleeping with/having children with/managing a "household" with them, the idea of giving up FREEDOM, your own bed, late nights out. Staying together "for the children's sake" and all that other nonsense. Marriage is a flaw and a drug.

At the same time, however, I've been doing a lot of thinking about my future. I'm a terrible housekeeper, a slob, organized only in my disorganization. Let's face it, I need help. I've always planned on having some sort of house-helper move in and live with me to take care of stuff. Basically I want a wife, time-warped from the early 20th century. I completely picture this person to be male. A man-wife. The problem is, though, what to I do when future houseboy wants to get up and marry someone? I can't very well have houseboy and family in my future estate.

In a way, I do plan to marry, but not in the normal sense of the word. I will have tons of houseboys (I'll keep them until they annoy me or get married, whichever comes first)and maybe asexual partners, but I will never have a serious wedding, if a wedding at all (once I was being a smart-ass and told someone I was going to get married in a Hello Kitty costume. I might actually do that, should the occasion arise). I just can't imagine me finding a nonsexual person who just wants to manage my household, heheheheh.

I saw a statistic today, though I question its veracity. It said that for every decade after age 25 that you remain single, you should deduct 1 year from your life. If you're married, you should add 5 years to your life. Any thoughts?

Basically I want a wife, time-warped from the early 20th century. I completely picture this person to be male. A man-wife. The problem is, though, what to I do when future houseboy wants to get up and marry someone? I can't very well have houseboy and family in my future estate.<<

What you want is a housekeeper...these persons tend to be cheaper than spouses. They also tend to do a better job managing a household than most spouses, and it's unlikely that they will want to marry you if you keep your relationship on a predominantly professional level.

About the death statistics...I think that these work for men in marriages, but not for women. I had heard that the general health and sense of well-being that women have when they get married decreases drastically from that of their single state. Men on the other had are less prone to self-destructive behavior and acquire lots of help with their lives when they get married and their health improves significantly... Isn't it ironic then that men are usually the ones who are supposedly dragged into marriage.

Judy

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nobara148
nobara148
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Re: Marriage, sorry I got carried away.

Parent Comment

Ok, I don't even understand why gay people want to get married, but I see nothing wrong with them marrying any more than straight people marrying.

I have made many, many anti-marriage statements in my life. I decided to give it another thought after reading BRC's post, though. It's really not marriage that I'm against. It's the sexual essence of a marriage, the wedding night, the wedding itself, physical attraction, "soul mates" (gag), the idea of living as a unit and no longer as a person, of being a responsible adult, of managing a "household", of the expectancy of children (lots of children) and a house and a picket fence, the idea of never seeing your old friends because you're not sleeping with/having children with/managing a "household" with them, the idea of giving up FREEDOM, your own bed, late nights out. Staying together "for the children's sake" and all that other nonsense. Marriage is a flaw and a drug.

At the same time, however, I've been doing a lot of thinking about my future. I'm a terrible housekeeper, a slob, organized only in my disorganization. Let's face it, I need help. I've always planned on having some sort of house-helper move in and live with me to take care of stuff. Basically I want a wife, time-warped from the early 20th century. I completely picture this person to be male. A man-wife. The problem is, though, what to I do when future houseboy wants to get up and marry someone? I can't very well have houseboy and family in my future estate.

In a way, I do plan to marry, but not in the normal sense of the word. I will have tons of houseboys (I'll keep them until they annoy me or get married, whichever comes first)and maybe asexual partners, but I will never have a serious wedding, if a wedding at all (once I was being a smart-ass and told someone I was going to get married in a Hello Kitty costume. I might actually do that, should the occasion arise). I just can't imagine me finding a nonsexual person who just wants to manage my household, heheheheh.

I saw a statistic today, though I question its veracity. It said that for every decade after age 25 that you remain single, you should deduct 1 year from your life. If you're married, you should add 5 years to your life. Any thoughts?

So I'm curious about a few things in light of drk's statements about marriage. First, do you believe that marriage is flawed by its essential nature and can never work out? I recognize that bad situations can arrise within the institution of marriage but the examples I've been surrounded with, including my parents, have given me a fairly positive view of the whole thing...provided of course that one approaches it in the right way and knows exactly what is involved in making the decision. Ok, it doesn't always work out but it seems to me that sometimes it does. When it does it also seems to be more of a close friendship that occasionally involves sex rather than primarily being a sexual relationship. I think thats why you get talk of Boston Marriages and marriage-like partnerships among the asexual community and elsewhere. Any thoughts?

I'm also wondering how you define an "asexual partner." How does this differ from someone just being a really close friend? What are the distinctions involved that cause you to use a term that mirrors that used to describe sexual relationships between people of various orientations? Are you talking about asexual people who live together or something else entirely?